Subject: Life Doesn’t Have to be Hard
Welcome to Celebrating the Journey!
produced by Margo Chisholm
The Freedom Coach
Monday, November 15, 1999
I , once again, welcome our new subscribers and thank
those of you who forward CTJ to friends, family and
coworkers. The emails I receive in response to CTJ let me
know that the words I’m drawn to write each week are of
value. That is a great joy to me. I delight in our growing
family. My apologies for the missing CTJ of last week.
Sometimes life throws surprises that create unwanted
consequences, and the best we can do is accept them and
move on to the next indicated thing.
Life Doesn’t Have To Be Hard.
As a matter of fact it isn’t supposed to be hard!
About two years ago, I made the choice to stop efforting at
life. I worked very hard at my life for most of its duration.
When it was too easy, I created problems that made it
hard. And when it was, in fact, hard I made sure
everyone around me knew how hard it was so they could
see how well I was dealing with all the problems in my
life! I didn’t think very highly of who I was back then,
and the only way I knew to create any sense of self-worth
was to overcome problems. It took so much effort to
overcome the problems in my life that I didn’t have any
time or energy left to even see the joy and love and peace
and freedom that was available for me, much less
experience it. Some of us only feel worthwhile when
we are pushing, striving, efforting, working really hard.
It is the only way we know how to feel like we are
That’s not how the Universe intends for life to be!
Efforting at life happens when we obtain our self-worth by
overcoming problems; when we live our lives based on
what other people think and want rather than on what we think and want;
when we are so busy getting our needs
met that we don’t know what we value; when we do what
we “should” do rather than what we are drawn to do;
when we become human doings rather than human
beings; when we try to figure life out rather than listening
to what our hearts say; when we don’t put our Self first.
Yeah, but… I can hear all the buttons being pushed! But
life is hard sometimes! Nope! Challenging, difficult,
strenuous, arduous, tough? Yes, life can be all those
things! Hard and an effort? No. It is in part a semantic
game I am playing here to differentiate between the
challenges life presents us and the attitude we bring to
them. Life brings us challenges. What we do with those
challenges and how we feel about them makes life an
effort, a struggle and exhausting. Or makes it satisfying,
joyful and energizing. It is a choice.
Choosing an attitude of acceptance and affirmation
toward whatever life brings us, based on what you Value,
creates a feeling of joy and satisfaction. A negative
perspective, based on Needs, can bring the bowed-head
posture of, “Life is so hard.” Which do you want?
What areas of your life are you making “hard”? What
areas of your life feel joyful and satisfying? What is the
difference between them? How can you bring more of
what makes life “easy” into the areas that feel “hard”?
Begin the process of letting go of the behaviors and beliefs
that make life feel hard (Needs) and claiming the
behavior and beliefs that make life feel satisfying and
joyful. To learn more about this process, reply to this
email with the words “Needs and Values” in the subject.
I’ll send you two checklists which will facilitate the
discovery of your own Needs and Values.
Acceptance + Value-Based Choices + Met Needs =
When push comes to should,
Margo Chisholm and Steve Straus
“Why does it have to be so hard?”
Margo Chisholm and Becky Jackson
Peace is not needing to know what will happen next.
Take Time For Your Life by Cheryl Richardson.
This gem of a book will guide you through a 7-step
process to eliminate the behaviors and actions, people and
beliefs that drain your life and replace them those that fill
your life. This is a great way to shift your attitude from
“hard” to free, successful and joyful. Click to order:
Your Best Year Yet by Jinny Ditzler
A simple 10-step plan for reevaluating your
priorities and creating a simpler life that feels full rather
than “hard”. It’s available by clicking here:
Give yourself the gift of effortless living this week.
I am once again offering Coaching Gift Certificates for this
Holiday Season. The certificates are for one month of
coaching – that’s 4 half hour sessions – at the discounted
rate of $150. They are available through the end of 1999, to
give as gifts or as an introductory new client rate for the
month of January, 2000. Give the gift of coaching to a
Copyright © 1999, all rights reserved, by Margo Chisholm
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The author of this article is Margo Chisholm. You may
contact her at (970)704-9336 or at mailto:firstname.lastname@example.org.
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energy for YOUR journey to creating success and freedom
in all areas of your life. CTJ will use stories from my life
and others’, coaching tips and resources, quotes and
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have a coach for the most important game of all: the game
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“At every moment of our life we have an
opportunity to choose joy.”
Henri J. M. Nouwen
Coach, Speaker, Author, Therapist
Partnering you in having success,
freedom and joy in all areas of your life
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