Subject: Quit Trying So Hard!

Welcome to Celebrating the Journey!
Monday, April 10, 2000
Issue #21


1. Welcome Notes
2. Quit Trying So Hard!
3. Coaching: An Exercise, An Assignment and A
4. Quotes: There Is No Try
5. Reading for the Journey
6. Humor: How to Give Your Cat A Pill
7. Your Best Year Yet: How Does Trying Limit You?
8. Shameless Marketing: In Case You Didn’t Read It
Last Week!

1. Welcome Notes

Spring has sprung here in the mountains of Colorado. At
least for today. It is an exquisite day, and there is a
marvelous variety of birdlife spending the day around the
pond behind my house. I awoke to a melodious concert of
trilling Blackbird altos, haunting-voiced Killdeer
sopranos, quacking duck tenors and the baritone sounds
of honking Canada geese. Truly a day to be grateful!

Welcome to our 42 new subscribers this week. The
springtime birthing continues!

2. Quit Trying So Hard!

The dictionary defines the word “try” as “an attempt to do
or accomplish”. We have all at some times in our lives,
(perhaps only a few minutes ago!) tried very hard to do something.

We TRY to find the time to relax.
We TRY to hit a consistent 9 iron or backhand.
We TRY to get the project done by the deadline.
We TRY to meditate.
We TRY to attract a partner.
We TRY to be on time.

But how often do we accomplish what we “try”?

I tried for many years to quit drinking.
I tried to lose weight.
Last week I tried to make 50 phone calls to promote a
workshop I’m giving next week. (Yup. Your Best Year

And I didn’t accomplish any of it.

Not until I stopped trying and started doing.

Trying doesn’t get it done – whatever “it” is.

Trying comes from SHOULDing on ourselves; from
living someone else’s dreams; from settling for something
less than we really want; from being afraid that we can’t
do it. Trying happens when we’re attempting to do
something our hearts don’t really want or when we don’t
believe we can be who we really want to be. “I’m trying so
hard,” is a great way to rationalize what isn’t working in
our lives.

So quit trying so hard and open your heart and your eyes
and your mind to what you really want in your life.
3. Coaching

An Exercise

Sit down at a table or desk with a pen in front of you.
Try to pick up the pen.
What happened?
Did you pick up the pen? OK, then put it back down. I
didn’t tell you to pick up the pen. I told you to TRY to pick
up the pen.
Once again, TRY to pick it up.
What happened? Get it?

Trying doesn’t get the pen picked up. We can TRY as hard
as we can, but it doesn’t get the pen picked up. Or the 9-
iron consistent. Or us relaxed. Or the project done.

You get the idea.

An Assignment

Eliminate the word TRY from your vocabulary.
Replace it with something like

I intend to
I am focused on
My purpose is
I am committed to (only if you really mean it!)

Observe what happens to your energy level.

I’d love to hear how this assignment goes for you. Email
me and let me know!

A Question

How do we know when we’re trying rather than doing or

Here are some of the answers I’ve heard from clients.

Trying feels like a huge effort
Trying keeps us awake at night
Trying makes it hard to ask for help
Trying isolates us
Trying is fatiguing rather than energizing
Trying gets in the way of living

So quit trying so hard and get on with having the life you
REALLY want!


Try not.
Do or do not.
There is no try.

5. Reading For The Journey

Your Best Year Yet by Jinny Ditzler

“Simple Abundance” meets “The 7 Habits of Highly
Effective People” in this transformational program. This
simple 10-step process will reveal where you’re “trying” to
have what you want in your life and why it isn’t working.
I liked it so much, I’m now leading the workshop! The
book is available by clicking here:

No Ordinary Moments: A Peaceful Warrior’s Guide to
Daily Life by Dan Millman

Dan Millman, author of the best-selling “Way of the
Peaceful Warrior” presents simple yet powerful ways to
balance the body, liberate the mind, accept our emotions,
and open our hearts; to turn our intentions into action,
our challenges into strength, and our life experiences into

Millman writes in the introduction,
“Beneath the surface of daily life lies a
deeper quest — a journey up a mountain
path toward our hopes and dreams. “No
Ordinary Moments” serves as a map up
that mountain to a new way of life.”

I don’t agree with all of Mailman’s philosophies but this
book has wonderful tools to support our taking action
rather than being stuck in trying. It’s available for only
$10.36 by clicking here:

6. Humor: Instructions For Giving Your Cat A Pill

1) Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left
arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and
thumb on either side of cat’s mouth and gently apply
pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand.
As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to
close mouth and swallow.

2) Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa.
Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

3) Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

4) Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm
holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open
and push pill to back of mouth with right fore-finger.
Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

5) Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of
wardrobe. Call friend.

6) Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees,
hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by
cat. Get friend to hold head firmly with one hand while
forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down remove
ruler and rub cat’s throat vigorously.

7) Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from
foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains.
Carefully sweep shattered Doulton figures from hearth
and set to one side for gluing later.

8) Wrap cat in large towel and get friend to lie on cat
with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end
of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow
down drinking straw.

9) Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans,
drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply band-aid to
friend’s forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold
water and soap.

10) Retrieve cat from neighbor’s shed. Get another pill.
Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave
head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon.
Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

11) Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door
back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check
records for date of last tetanus shot. Throw Tee-shirt
away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12) Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the
road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while
swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap.

13) Tie cat’s front paws to rear paws with garden twine
and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty
pruning gloves from shed, hold cat’s mouth open with
small spanner. Push pill into mouth followed by large
piece of fillet of steak. Hold head vertically and pour pint
of water down throat to wash pill down.

14) Get friend to drive you to the emergency room, sit
quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and
removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop
on way home to order new table.

15) Arrange for SPCA to collect cat. Ring local pet shop
to see if they have any hamsters.

7. Your Best Year Yet

Question 4 of the ten questions in the Your Best Year Yet
process is: How Do I Limit Myself, and How Do I Stop?

How do you limit yourself by “trying” to do things? How
can you use the tools in this CTJ to stop?

10. Shameless Marketing

Your Best Year Yet Special!

I have 4 YBYY workshops scheduled in the next two
months. I’m offering a 20% discount on registration to all
CTJ subscribers for any Your Best Year Yet workshop in
the months of April and May. John Gray said about Your
Best Year Yet, “Personal success does not have to be years
away. [Your Best Year Yet] masterfully guides you from
thought to action and inspires you to start actualizing
your heart’s desires this year.”

Can the next 12 months of YOUR life be your Best Year
Yet? You bet it can! This 3 1/2 hour workshop leads you to
a simple one-page plan for exactly that, and provides
tools to support you in following the plan. It’s a small
investment with a big return!

Workshop dates and locations are:

Aspen, Colorado, Sat. 4/15, 8:30 am – noon
Grand Junction, Colorado, Mon., 4/17, 6 – 9:30 pm
San Diego, California, Sat. 4/29, 8:30 am – noon
Boston, Mass., Fri. May 5/19, 8:30 – noon

Visit for more
information or click to
receive a registration form or answers to any questions.

Margo has a few slots open for motivated clients who
want to create a successful life and have the time to enjoy
it. Every dedicated athlete has a coach. Why not
have a coach for the most important game of all: the
game of life. Visit our website at for additional resources
and tools. To schedule a consultation, send an email to

Give yourself the gift of not trying this week.

Namaste, Margo

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My purpose in publishing Celebrating the Journey is to
provide you with resources, motivation, inspiration and
energy for YOUR journey to creating success and freedom
in all areas of your life. CTJ will use stories from my life
and others’, coaching tips and resources, quotes and
humor to deliver a learning experience that can enhance
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Copyright © 2000, all rights reserved, by Margo Chisholm

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author of this article is Margo Chisholm. You may contact
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“At every moment of our life we have an
opportunity to choose joy.”
Henri J. M. Nouwen

Margo Chisholm
Coach, Speaker, Author, Therapist
Partnering you in having success,
freedom and joy in all areas of your life
970-704-9336 fax 970-704-9346


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