Subject: What Does Worrying Get You?
Welcome to Celebrating the Journey!
produced by Margo Chisholm
Coach, Speaker, Author, Adventurer
Monday, February 21, 2000
Issue #15
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What Does Worrying Get You?
I run across people every day who seem to be viewing life
through “doom glasses.”
The company picnic is going to be a disaster.
I’ll never get the raise I need, and how will I feed
my family?
If I call that prospect, they might say no.
I can’t go skiing even though it’s sunny and
beautiful because I might make a fool of myself.
These people what-if themselves completely out of
participating in life.
What if I say the wrong thing?
What if they don’t like me?
What if it rains?
What if I fail?
What if the world ends?
All too often these “doom views” and what-if’s prevent
us from taking the actions that will resolve or solve what
we’re worrying about. When we worry, we use up the
energy that could be fueling the actions that would
actually dispel the worry!
For some of us worry has become a way of life. We have
begun to believe that if we don’t worry about something it
will happen for sure. As if worry somehow had the power
to ward off tragedy. “Well, if I think about this hard
enough it will go away.” Actually, it’s just the opposite.
Peter McWilliams wrote, “Thoughts, if persisted in, can
produce states of consciousness that, if persisted in, can
produce physical manifestation.” He’s right. Worrying is
more likely to cause something to happen than to prevent
it.
“Worryholism” can be just as destructive to our spirits as
alcoholism. It removes us from our families and loved
ones; it gets in the way of our performance at work; it
creates physical problems; it robs us of our spirituality.
And we hide it under the umbrella of “caring”. “I worry
about my brother because I care about him so much.”
When we are worrying, we lose all the possibilities of the
moment and convince ourselves that we’re somehow
helping the situation. The truth is that worrying does no
good at all. In actuality, it often just makes things worse.
What does worrying get us? It gets us…
Removed from the possibilities of the present
moment
Lost in the fear of what might happen
Out of having to take action
Ulcers
Stress
Loss of peace of mind
Lack of intimacy
The opposite of what we want
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COACHING:
Ask yourself the question, “Am I willing to stop
worrying?”
If the answer is no, great! Give yourself permission
to worry. Set aside a period of time each day – I suggest a
minimum of a half hour – that is your worry time. If you
need more than one, have two or even three. Whenever
you notice yourself worrying about something, write it
down on a worry list so you don’t forget it. Then when it’s
your designated worry time, set an alarm for the chosen
amount of time, get out your list and worry your little
heart out! Think of the worst things that could possibly
happen. Visualize the worst rainstorm of the year at your
daughter’s outdoor wedding. What happens if your son
doesn’t get into college? This headache must mean you
have a brain tumor. I’ll never have enough money. My
car is going to blow up on the way to the city. My husband
(wife) doesn’t love me anymore. Go for it! Jump in there
and worry. For that period of time, just wallow in
worrying. And when the alarm goes off, put your list
away, and go back to your day. You’ll be focused on the
actions in front of you, present with the people in your
life, and energized to create the day the way you want it to
be.
If your answer is yes (reminder: the question is, “Am I
willing to stop worrying?), create a Worry Box. This can be
as simple as a jar with a lid or as elaborate as you want to
make it. When you find yourself worrying about
something, first ask yourself if there are any actions you
can take right now to resolve whatever it is you’re
worrying about. If you’re worried about a phone
conversation, make the call. If you’re worried about a
brain tumor, call a doctor.
If there are no actions to take, write down your
worry on a piece of paper and put it in the Worry Box. As
you do, release the worry from your mind. Simply release
it. If you start worrying about the same thing again, repeat
the process.
Once a month, open your Worry Box and see what
worries are inside. How many of them are resolved? How
many had you forgotten about? How many of them seem
completely silly?
Burn the slips of paper from the worry box,
releasing them into the Universe.
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QUOTES:
What if…we knew everything was okay, and we didn’t
have to worry about a thing? What would we do then?
We’d be free to let go and enjoy life.
Melody Beattie
Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow; it only saps
today of its strength.
A.J. Cronin
I am an old man and have known many troubles, but
most of them never happened.
Mark Twain
Worry is a state of mind based on fear.
Napoleon Hill
RECOMMENDED READING:
Tuesdays With Morrie by Mitch Albom.
Morrie Schwartz was one of the greatest examples I know
of a man who lived without worry. His ability to embrace
life to its fullest right up until the moment he died, is a
shining example for us all. This is a book of great clarity,
wisdom and unembarrassed love. It is a gift for all who
read it. You can buy it by clicking
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0385484518/tothesummit
Don’t Worry, Make Money by Richard Carlson
>From the bestselling coauthor of Handbook for the Soul
and Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff comes a collection of 100
short essays that feature brilliant strategies for achieving
financial success by giving up stress, worry, anger, and
fear. But this book is about much more than just financial
success. One reader commented, “Dr. Carlson truly
understands the way fear and worry can limit a person’s
life. This book is NOT a financial guide or a get rich quick
book. In fact, ‘Don’t Worry, Live Better’ would probably be
a better title. I can honestly say that this book has helped
me overcome fears that have plagued me my entire life
and the difference in my life is amazing!” This is a great
addition to your letting-go-of-worry bookshelf. Order it
here for only $9.56:
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/078688360X/tothesummit.
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HUMOR
Perhaps the instructors mentioned in the following
quotes DO need to worry!
Printed on High Quality Paper
College students, at the end of a course, are often asked to
evaluate the various factors involved in it: Instructor,
test, and so forth. Here are some collected comments:
Text is useless. I use it to kill roaches in my room.
He teaches like Speedy Gonzalez on a caffeine high.
In class, the syllabus is more important than you are.
Help! I’ve fallen asleep and I can’t wake up!
His blackboard technique puts Rembrandt to shame.
Textbook is confusing…someone with a knowledge of
English should proofread it.
Have you ever fallen asleep in class and awoke in
another? That’s the way I felt all term.
This class was a religious experience for me…I had to
take it all on faith.
The recitation instructor would make a good parking lot
attendant. Tries to tell you where to go, but you can never
understand him.
Problem sets are a decoy to lure you away from potential
exam material.
Recitation was great. It was so confusing that I forgot who
I was, where I was, and what I was doing – it’s a great stress
reliever.
He is one of the best teachers I have had… He is well-
organized, presents good lectures, and creates interest in
the subject. I hope my comments don’t hurt his chances of
getting tenure.
I would sit in class and stare out the window at the
squirrels. They’ve got a cool nest in the tree.
The absolute value of the TA was less than epsilon.
TA steadily improved throughout the course… I think he
started drinking and it really loosened him up.
Information was presented like a ruptured fire hose –
spraying in all directions – no way to stop it.
I never bought the text. My $60 was better spent on the Led
Zeppelin tapes that I used while doing the problem sets.
What’s the quality of the text? Text is printed on high
quality paper.
The course was very thorough. What wasn’t covered in
class was covered on the final exam.
This comes from The Twisted Straw newsletter providing daily humor.
You can subscribe at http://www.twistedstraw.com.
Give yourself the gift of letting go of worrying this week.
Namaste, Margo
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TODAY’S OPPORTUNITIES:
FREE DEMO COACHING SESSIONS!
Curious about how coaching works? Spend a half hour on
the phone with me – totally free – and find out how your
life can shift in 30 short minutes. Email me today at
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session. This is a great way to pave the way for taking
advantage of the Spring Special.
SPRING SPECIAL!
I’m offering a series of 3 half hour coaching sessions
during the month of March for $100. Welcome the
coming of spring by watering and fertilizing the garden
that is your life. Bulbs grow fast at this time of year. You
can, too! Email mailto:margo@tothesummit.com to find
out more about this great special! Sorry folks, this offer is
not available to current clients.
COMING SOON:
Your Best Year Yet! You’ll be receiving an email later this
week describing my experience with this great workshop
and telling you how to get more information about it.
Another way to create the life you REALLY want!
I have a few spaces available in my coaching practice.
Every serious athlete has a COACH. Why not have one
for the most important game of all: Life! Contact me at
mailto:margo@tothesummit.com or visit her website for
information and resources for having the life you
REALLY want at https://www.tothesummit.com.
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Copyright © 2000, all rights reserved, by Margo Chisholm
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author of this article is Margo Chisholm. You may contact
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have a coach for the most important game of all: the
game of life. Visit our website at
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—
“At every moment of our life we have an
opportunity to choose joy.”
Henri J. M. Nouwen
Margo Chisholm
Coach, Speaker, Author, Therapist
Partnering you in having success,
freedom and joy in all areas of your life
970-704-9336 fax 970-704-9346
margo@tothesummit.com
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