Subject: Celebrating the Journey: Step Three: Role Play
Welcome to Celebrating the Journey!
Friday, February 7, 2003
TABLE OF CONTENTS
1. Welcome Notes
2. Step Three: Role Play: A Wheel Needs Spokes
3. Coaching: Identify the Spokes of Your Life
4. Quotes for the Journey
5. Humor: Things That it Took Me 50 Years to
1. Welcome Notes
A bright, crisp morning in Santa Cruz, California. We
have been blessed with the weather this past week:
nippy mornings, even a bit of frost, and deliciously
warm and sunny days. My heart sings with joy at
walking on the beach in the warmth of the sun in
February! I send my sincere condolences and best
wishes to all of you who are shoveling snow.
As always, I offer a sincere welcome to our new
subscribers. And thank those of you who wrote to let
us know that the Vision issue was valuable for you. It
touched many of you.
This is the fourth in a series of eight issues on The
Seven Steps to Successful Goal Setting. You can read
the previous three, and all past issues of CTJ, at
I wish each you of you a peaceful week. May we all
live each minute from a place of love in this
tumultuous time. Remember that no matter what the
question, love is the answer.
2. Role Play: A Wheel Needs Spokes
We all play different roles in our lives. I am not just
Margo. I am Margo who is Margo’s coach; Margo the
athlete; Margo the lover; Margo the friend; Margo the
Coach; Margo who does service; Margo the financial
In looking at my life from the perspective of these
roles, I have a clearer picture of my life, one which
integrates the various parts of that life while placing
the core of who I am – my values – at the center.
A car or bicycle wheel doesn’t exist as a simple circle.
To function well, the wheel needs spokes which
connect it to its hub. The spokes are the roles which
connect our values – the hub of the wheel – to its
perimeter – our life. Examining them gives us a
clearer picture of where our lives are out of round
and how best to balance the wheel.
I’ll give you an example. I had been aware for several
months that, as full and wonderful as my life is, there
was something missing. I hadn’t been able to pinpoint
what it was. When I listed the roles in my life and
examined it from that perspective, it was clear that
my service role was way out of balance, in fact it was
pretty much nonexistent. The shortness of the
“service spoke” in my life wheel made it near
impossible for that wheel to turn smoothly.
That awareness made it simple to bring the wheel
back into round. I now do several hours of service
each week. My life is once again round, and the wheel
is no longer squeaky.
Looking at our lives from the perspective of the roles
which comprise it is a simple and important method
of self-examination. It easily clarifies the areas that are
working and the ones that aren’t and provides vital
information for creating goals that are based on
values, passion and who you are rather than on
shoulds, needs or have to’s.
3. Coaching: Identify the Spokes of Your Life Wheel
To begin this process, remember that this list of roles
is just for now. It isn’t written in stone for the rest of
your life. It is a common thing to drop roles, create
new ones or modify existing ones as life brings new
information and opportunities.
Start with the roles you are now playing in your life.
What are my current responsibilities?
What am I accountable for in my life?
What do I do each day? On the weekends? What
would I call the role I’m playing in each of those
Now consider the roles you’re not actively focused on
and would like to be.
What role have you had in the past that has been
put on the back burner?
What area of your life would you like to be more
What spoke is missing in your life wheel?
Then expand your horizons a bit. I had dreamed of
mountains for many years before I started climbing
and had never set foot on a mountain. Adding the
role of climber to my wheel, got the process of
becoming a mountaineer going.
What dream role do you have?
What have you always wanted to do and never
had the courage?
Adventurer, writer, sailor, dancer, actor — what
dream spoke will support your life more strongly?
It is important that one of your roles focuses on
taking care of yourSelf. Your own coach, your own
caretaker, your own facilitator. However you name
that role, it is vital that you take care of yourSelf or
you cannot be truly available for ANY of the roles in
When you have your list, count the number of roles
on it. If it’s more than eight, consolidate so you have
no more than eight. It’s common in our culture to
design a life that is so complicated that no role
receives the focus it deserves and wants. This
weakens each of the spokes of the wheel until it
collapses into itself. Reduce the number of spokes so
the wheel can be strong.
Finally, choose which role you want to serve as your
major focus. Which spoke of your wheel will serve as
the base at this time in your life?
This role identification process is a simple one. It is
also very powerful. Along with the values and vision
from Steps One and Two, it provides you with the
information from which to create goals that motivate,
inspire, infuse, excite and draw us forward.
Values, Vision, Roles form the foundation for setting
goals which support and enrich your theme for this
year. Living that theme facilitates the actions and
changes you want for your life. Identify your Values;
create your Vision; clarify your Roles to create the life
you REALLY want.
It often happens that I wake at night and begin to
think about a serious problem and decide I must tell
the Pope about it. Then I wake up completely and
remember that I am the Pope.
Pope John XXIII
We cannot create a wonderful life by chasing it; we
attract it by the way we live our days.
Life consists not in holding good cards, but in playing
those you hold well.
If you keep doing what you’ve always done, you’ll
keep getting what you’ve always gotten.
5. Humor: Things That it Took Me 50 Years to Learn
I love Dave Barry’s ability to communicate wonderful
messages in a tasty dose of humor. Enjoy these tasty
Things That it Took Me 50 Years to Learn by Dave
1. Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill
and a laxative on the same night.
2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason the
human race has not achieved, and never will achieve,
its full potential, that would would be “meetings.”
3. There is a very fine line between “hobby” and
4. People who want to share their religious views
with you almost never want you to share yours with
them in return.
5. And when God, who created the entire universe
with all of its glories, decides to deliver a message to
humanity, He will NOT use as His messenger, a
person on cable TV with a bad haircut.
6. You should not confuse your career with your life.
7. No matter what happens, somebody will find a
way to take it too seriously.
8. When trouble arises and things look bad, there is
always one individual who perceives a solution and is
willing to take command. Very often, that individual
9. Nobody cares if you can’t dance well. Just get up
10. The most powerful force in the universe is gossip.
11. A person who is nice to you, but rude to the
waiter, is not a nice person.
12. Your friends love you anyway.
Give yourself the gift of knowing the roles of your
life this week, and as always, Celebrate Life!
Hiring a Life Coach is a great way to be supported in
making this year the best year of your life. Margo has
a few slots open for motivated clients who are
committed to taking the actions to create the life you
dream of living. To schedule a consultation, send an
e-mail to mailto:firstname.lastname@example.org. Visit our
website at https://www.tothesummit.com for
additional resources and tools.
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My purpose in publishing Celebrating the Journey is
to provide you with resources, motivation,
inspiration and energy for YOUR journey of creating
success and freedom in all areas of your life. CTJ will
use stories from my life and others, coaching tips and
resources, quotes and humor to deliver a learning
experience that can enhance your life. I am always
looking for comments, ideas and ways to improve
CTJ. I welcome your e-mails at
Copyright © 2003, all rights reserved, by Margo
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limits to our abilities do not exist”
Pierre Teilhard de Chardinl
The Freedom Coach
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