Subject: What I Think of You Is None of Your Business. Or Mine!
Welcome to Celebrating the Journey!
produced by Margo Chisholm
Coach, Speaker, Author, Adventurer
Monday, January 24, 2000
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What I Think of You is None of Your Business. Or Mine!
Last week I told you that What You Think of Me Is None
of My Business. It’s equally true that What I Think of You
is None of Your Business. Nor is it mine! “What,” you
say? “How can what I think of you not be my business?
Aren’t I responsible for my own thoughts?” Yes, you are,
absolutely. My question to you is why are you spending
your time thinking about someone else at all? Of course
we hold the people we care about close in our minds and
heart; of course we think about them; of course our
connection with people is important.
The kind of thinking I’m talking about sounds like this:
She doesn’t work as hard as I do. I should earn
He’s more spiritual than I am.
They don’t spend enough time with their children.
She eats too much.
He doesn’t exercise enough.
If I only had as much money as she does, I could
live my dreams.
The kind of thinking I’m talking about is comparing
ourselves to others; judging others because their values
are different than ours; being “right” by judging others’
behavior; feeling resentment about another person. Guess
who pays the price for that? Not them! They don’t know
what you’re thinking. Your thoughts aren’t taking up
space in their head. They probably know that What You
Think of Them Is None of Their Business anyway! So
who pays the price?
Living in the freedom of our own thoughts and dreams
and goals, not affected by other people’s opinions, also
means that we accept the thoughts and dreams and goals
and behavior of others. Without judging them or
comparing them to us in any way.
As I wrote last week, creating the life we really want
requires that we honor our own values and dreams and
goals and remember that What You Think of Me Is None
of My Business. It also requires that we honor the values
and dreams and goals and opinions of others and
remember that What I Think of You Is None of My
How does your need to be right get in the way of
In what ways do you compare yourselves to others?
What part of your own life are you avoiding by
looking at the lives of others?
Let your judgments go and learn to relish the differences
between us. Imagine how bored we would all be if
everyone thought the same thing, wore the same clothes,
acted the same way! Applaud the idiosyncrasies, the
quirks, the singularity, the individuality of us all.
Celebrate the differences rather than judging. It will free
Forgiveness is the key to action and freedom.
A man never discloses his own character so clearly as
when he describes another’s.
Jean Paul Richter
How far you go in life depends on your being tender with
the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with
the striving, and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because
someday in your life you will have been all of these.
George Washington Carver
Ethics for the New Millennium by The Dalai Lama.
It is not new thought that our culture has embraced
materialism foolishly thinking that possessions will make
them happy or that we have turned to violence because
we no longer feel connected to one another. The Dalai
Lama here calls for an ethic based on human
interconnection. He believes that true happiness is based
on an inner peace which is not affected by circumstance;
such peace is only attained “when our actions are
motivated by a concern for others.” This Noble Peace
Prize winner underlines the importance of releasing all
that keeps us apart from our fellow human beings. His
book is available for only $17.45 at
Give yourself the gift of freedom from judgment this
Margo’s book, “To The Summit: A Woman’s Journey into
the Mountains to Find Her Soul” is no longer available in
stores in the hardcover version. You can purchase a
signed copy by sending a check for $18 – a 25% discount –
37 Dakota Meadows Dr.
Carbondale, CO 81623
To find out more about Margo and her book, visit her
website at https://www.tothesummit.com.
Margo has a few spaces available in her coaching practice.
Every serious athlete has a coach. Why not have one for
the most important game of all: Life! Contact Margo at
mailto:email@example.com or visit her website for
information and resources for YOUR life at
Copyright © 1999, all rights reserved, by Margo Chisholm
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have a coach for the most important game of all: the
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“At every moment of our life we have an
opportunity to choose joy.”
Henri J. M. Nouwen
Coach, Speaker, Author, Therapist
Partnering you in having success,
freedom and joy in all areas of your life
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